Mother OR Pastor OR maybe both

Over the last few weeks, I haven't been writing much and for that I apologize. I like think about what I write and make sure that I like it before I post. It has been so busy around our house trying to pack and prepare to move and say goodbye.

But I have been reading a lot and pondering. Today I was reading RevGalBlogPals post which asked a question of women pastors. "How do you handle the issue of breastfeeding my infant while working?"

When I first read the question my gut reaction was "what issue?" I know that I live in my ignorance is bliss world, you don't have to tell me. But it never dawned on me that people might not approve of a pastor breastfeeding.

I was always discrete when I needed to nurse a child. My husband would generally have a bottle ready in case she needed to eat while I was busy in the pulpit. But to me, breastfeeding was natural and important for my daughter. Reflecting back now, I can see that it might have been a bit different for members of the congregation. But no one ever said a word against it to me.

Recently, I was talking with a member of my congregation about my style of prayer in worship. She commented that you "acted like this is the way to do it" and so we all went along. Now she can't imagine having a prayer for the people without lifting each person by name with pauses after each name. I think I carried myself in a way that let people know that I was still their pastor, but at the same time my child needed me. Both of my children were nursed until they were at least a year old. For that I am grateful that this was possible.

Breastfeeding was a wonderful time for me to bond with my child. I loved having her snuggle up. Churches need to realize and be open to pastors being a parent (either mom or dad) as well as a pastor. Almost 6 years ago, I interviewed with my current congregation. In the middle of dinner, my 5 month old informed me she was ready to eat. I got up from the table. Once she was latched on, I discreetly put a towel over her before joining them again for the rest of dinner. Looking back now, I wonder what that committee of 2 men and 4 women were thinking. At the time, it never even crossed my mind that it might not be the best thing to do because my daughter needed me.

I pray for women colleagues everywhere as they explore this issue. We can feed our children in a way that is good for them while still pastoring a congregation.